Friday, May 11, 2012

Mother's Day Reflections 2012

Mother's Day is just a few days away and I find myself overwhelmed with feelings.  I am so grateful to have been blessed with 2 beautiful children here on Earth, but I am always reminded that someone is missing from our family pictures.  Most of my blog readers are here because you know me personally or you have suffered the loss of a child.  No matter how you found me, I'm glad you are here.

For those who have not lost a child themselves, I'm sure you know someone who has suffered a loss, whether it be through miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, or SUID.  Our losses are very different, but we all share the same feelings.  We all share a lifetime of pain and sorrow because someone very important to us is missing.  It doesn't matter if you were pregnant for a week or 40, whether you gave birth to a live baby or a silent one, if you brought your baby home from the hospital or your baby lived it's entire life in the hospital.  Mother's Day is a reminder that someone is missing.

I am very fortuate.  I have an energentic little boy and a sweet newborn baby girl to hold on Mother's Day.  But I have many friends who do not.  This day is something they dread all year long.  It's hard to look around and see families with children who are smiling and happy and giving their Mom's handmade gifts and cards.  It's hurtful and I'm sure many of those friends will spend the day at home, away from the reminders of the day.  They are thinking to themselves "Am I a Mother?"

Those friends are just as much Mother's as you or I and they deserve to be celebrated.  They NEED to be recognized and celebrated.

Mother's Day is a day when we recognize and thank our Mothers and Grandmothers.   Some of them are also missing from Earth and this day will also prove to be a challenge and reminder of their grief and loss.

There are still others who dream of being a Mother, but struggle with infertility.  I was here myself just a year ago, and the year before that.  This day is a symbol of something they want so badly but have yet to acheive.  They cling to the hope of the children that are alive within their hearts and in their dreams, but have yet to make their Earthly appearance.

The most thoughtful and compassionate thing you can do on Sunday is to recognize with love and friendship those who are Mother's in the traditional sense, but also recognize and acknowledge those who hold their babies in their hearts.

There is a great organization, Star Legacy Foundation, which I am proud to serve on the Board of Directors.  They have a great page of suggestions of things you can do and say to those around you who may find themselves alone, isolated, or hurting this Mother's Day.  CLICK HERE for a list of Do's and Don'ts on special holidays or just everyday.  I promise you that reaching out to her will have a profound impact and mean more to her than you can imagine.  Speak with love, especially on this day, with these Mom's.  Unless you have walked this road, you really don't know what it's like ~ I promise.

Happy Mother's Day to all Mothers; no matter where your children live, they are always alive within your heart.

~ Shannon

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